The End of Senior Driving: Helping Mom Hang up the Keys
September 23, 2009 by admin
Filed under Advice, Assisted Living, Stories
When is it time to help mom or dad hang up the car keys for good? How do you bring up this sensitive topic to a loved one who is otherwise fairly independent? This is one we struggled with when my own mother had two accidents in short succession and sustained broken bones.
Depending on your loved one’s abilities, sometimes gradually decreasing driving is easier to swallow than removing driving rights all together. If they live in an Assisted Living facility, this should not be a great problem, as they will be able to take advantage of transportation assistance. But if they are independent, they don’t usually see that their driving skills have diminished. Encourage them to limit driving to a few local sites, and offer other transportation options for any appointments or errands which require longer distance or more skillful navigation (congested cities, higher speed highways, unfamiliar routes, etc.).
Before entering discussion with a loved one, do a little research on local transportation services, willing friends or family or volunteer services (if you are unable to provide transportation on a regular basis) so you’ll be able to present reasonable solutions that preserve their independence and dignity. Lovingly breach the topic, clearly expressing that their safety is your primary concern.
Action points:
1. Post a listing near their phone including
-local transportation services
-the names and numbers of willing family, friends, or volunteer services.
2. For really extreme cases, contact your local Department of Transportation. (Usually, if you are honest early on, it won’t come to this. Don’t let it get this far! Don’t be afraid to tell mom that she’s scaring you.)
