Is Your Senior Loved One a Hoarder?

I just read an article on the AARP website that hit close to home. It talks about hoarding. Specifically, it talks about senior citizens who have accumulated tons of stuff and don’t know how to get rid of it.

If hoarding was a strange phenomena a couple decades ago, it is a much more well documented issue today. There have been multiple books written on the subject, countless television specials, and even a reality series dedicated to the subject, aptly titled “Hoarders.” So you are probably familiar with what it is. Hoarding is, to many, an incredibly strange compulsive behavior to collect everything. Not collector’s items, mind you. Everything. Junk mail, empty boxes, dust bunnies, cotton swabs, plasticware, etc. It gets more and more bizarre. They keep collecting until their homes become oceans of junk. It is overwhelming to look at, let alone to live in. To the outside world, this is an unnerving, almost dark pattern of behavior. Families of hoarders feel helpless. There is simply no way for them to intervene. Having some personal experience with elderly hoarders in my own family, I understand why the AARP calls it a “psychological illness.” I don’t know how else to classify it.

Senior Hoarders

Seniors are hoarders at much higher rates than other adults. We can only guess why this might be so. Some seniors experienced some of the great depression as children, and can vividly remember not having any possessions at all. They can’t seem to bring themselves to throw things away, even this many decades later. For others, the loss of a spouse triggers it. Suddenly, everything in the house is meaningful, because it reminds them of their loved one. Yes, even paper cups, small cardboard boxes, and credit card applications. In the case of our family, both of these factors were partially responsible, but there are many other triggers.

What can a Family Do?

Our situation got so bad that the grown kids wouldn’t bring their little one’s over to grandma’s anymore. It was unsafe and unhealthy to stay in that environment. So we had an intervention with our loved one. A couple of them, actually. The results? Mixed at best. She understood the problem and said she planned to “get to” the clutter. We are still hoping that happens soon.

Some baffled families often turn to professional help, but even the medical community can’t offer much help a lot of the time. Psychologists have a difficult time dealing with this disorder. For whatever reason, some seniors seem to have no ability to pull themselves away from it.

So what can a family do? Definitely start with an intervention. You might have far better success than we did. Just be sure to do it with lots of respect. You can gently and gracefully tell your loved ones how their behavior is affecting the rest of the family, and urge them to let you help

Whether that works or not, I recommend you check out this website: Children of Hoarders. They have some great ideas on how to address the subject.

Finding the Right Senior Caregiver, part 2

So, you need a full or part time caregiver for your senior loved one. How can you find the right person? How can you tell if the person will treat your loved one with the proper level of care, professionalism, and respect? Here is our first tip, and it is an important preliminary one. Don’t skip this!

1) Assess Your Needs & Document Them

Now is the time to think of all you are going to need. Be specific and be thorough. Don’t just write “medical help.” Indicate whether you need a nurse, and what level of nurse. What kind of ADL’s (activities for daily life) do you need assistance for? Walking? Bathing? Going to the bathroom? What about other activities (IADS’s), like driving, cooking, and helping with housework?

Whatever it is, record it. Some caregivers are going to want to take care of some activities, but not others. And sometimes a senior caregiver who is not necessarily a nurse will be able to take care of some of those things, and that would certainly help your budget.

The point is, the senior and the caregiver need to have the same expectations. The key to getting expectations aligned is good communication. So before you conduct a search, put out an ad for help, conduct an interview, etc, figure out what your own expectations are. This will take care of a ton of problems on the outset.

For more info on this subject, visit this elder care law site or Inside Elder Care. And stay tuned for more tips on hiring a caregiver. And if you need to find Oregon assisted living or senior housing anywhere in the United States, click on the banner below.

Finding the Right Senior Caregiver, part 1

Recently, a scam artists bilked an 89 year old man out of thirty thousand dollars. Of course, this type of thing happens all the time, right? But there was something especially heinous about this story: the scammer was the man’s caregiver.

Here’s the story. In this case, the caregiver was a woman who pretended to cozy up to the wealthy man and start a romance. She was 58 years old. As he grew to trust her, he asked her to go buy a new car for him, which she could drive him around in. So he gave her the money. Thirty grand.

She bought the car, all right! She bought it, and put it in her name…

Thankfully, this time, the woman did not get away with it. She was arrested, tried and convicted for her fraud, and she even has to pay the money back in restitution. Justice has happened!

But the issue raises a larger issue in my mind: How do you choose a caregiver that you can trust? After all, this story took place in an Oregon assisted living home, but seniors who get home health care from an agency or an individual are far more vulnerable, even. When a person begins to get to know them, to understand how they operate, they could be very easy prey for a scam artist. It could happen through a false romance, but more likely, it could happen in far more subtle ways. A credit card disappearing. Old jewelry, lying around, is suddenly gone. Or it could happen in the most drastic ways of all: the caregiver winds up in the will of the senior, receiving lavish gifts. And the family can do nothing.

With this in mind, we will be exploring how we as family members can protect the ones we love when choosing a caregiver. The discussion will move far beyond protecting from fraud. We will look at how to find a person that will encourage your loved one. Someone who can really be able to relate to them. Someone who knows what they are doing.

So stay tuned for our series, “Finding the right Caregiver.”

Helping Seniors Start a New Chapter

Our philosophy on elder care is simple: we don’t just think it’s enough to just care for elders’ health and housing needs. We think they ought to be treasured. They have inherent value. Always have. And the fact that they cannot “contribute” to society at the same level they used to is of no concern of ours whatsoever. A person’s value is not measured by their contributions. It is built it, and it cannot be taken away.

That is why this idea makes me so happy. Recently, the Marquis Home Health company began something called the “New Chapters Program.” It seems to be rooted in this value system. Seniors should not simply be taken care of, they should be listened to. They still have hopes and dreams. They have things they are passionate about. And far too often, they believe that all of these are out of reach. The New Chapter Program sets this notion straight.

This program is initiated by the employees of Marquis Home Health. Employees listen to their patients, trying to understand what makes them tick. And when they are able, they try to step in and help them “turn a page” in their life. To start a new chapter in their life.

For instance, there was one man who used to love skiing. It was a major part of of his growing up. But today, he lives in an Oregon assisted living community, and he has multiple sclerosis. So obvkously, skiing is out of the question, right?

Wrong.

The good folks at Marquis Home Health helped him take to the slopes again, even in his condition. Here is a picture:

This particular story can be found here at an Oregon news site.

Another woman wanted to turn a page in her life by getting into the digital age. Marquis bought her a laptop. She was overjoyed!

Don’t mistake this program for a version of the “Make a Wish” program. These residents aren’t dying. They simply want to begin a new phase of life. And the program validates their wishes. And by doing this, they show how much they value these seniors.

We think that’s awesome.

Laughter: A New Trend in Senior Exercise

Okay, this is an interesting one… We have written a lot on ways for seniors to stay active and healthy. We talked about walking, swimming, Pilates, Yoga, and the list goes on. All of these activities help elderly men and women stay healthy to one degree or another. But today, I ran across an article that made me laugh, partly in amusement, partly in incredulity. Here it is: Laughter Yoga.

Here is the deal. Laughter Yoga is almost a misnomer. There is no stretching, and there are no funny poses. You don’t have to be flexible, and you are not aloud to be serene. The only Yoga-esque characteristic here is some deep breathing here and there. Everything else is just, well, silliness.

Case in point: there is a Laughter Yoga studio in Portland, Oregon. A class of about twenty people (almost all women) come together and do “laughter exercises.” They practice laughing in all different imaginary situations. They get in a big circle, and pretend they are opening up a mailbox and finding their credit card bill. The bill is so high, all you can do is laugh! So they laugh outrageously. They do many variations of these little scenarios, and even if people are pushing it in the beginning, they all end up legitimately cracking up after a bit.

The instructor at this studio took her unique strategy to an Oregon Assisted Living facility recently, and the residents seem to really enjoy it. So even though I find the whole thing to be a bit odd, I have to hand it to them: this could really help some senior citizens. After all, it’s fun to be silly, and people have a good time. But that isn’t the main point. The point, as doctors have said many, many times, is that laughter is excellent medicine, and pretty good exercise, too.

The Mayo Clinic website even touts the benefits of laughter. Among other things, they say it:

• Stimulates organs like the heart and lungs by increasing your oxygen intake when you breath, and increases the release of endorphins that the brain releases.
• Relieves tension by stimulating better blood circulation
• Fosters relaxation
• Boosts your immune system
• Can help relieve pain
• Increases your personal sense of wellness

For seniors, who are already very often battling a lot of health problems and emotional difficulties, laughter can go a long way. For some, laughter yoga might help that process.

Laughter yoga is making its rounds not only in Oregon, but around the world. Just google it on Youtube and see all the examples. it’s… interesting. Is it silly? Yes. Would I be caught dead in a laughter yoga class? In a word, no. But could it help our aging loved ones in senior care facilities? Yes, without doubt, it could help. Because even though it seems incredibly silly, laughter is good for you. And if it is good for seniors, then it is good for all of us!

« Previous Page — Next Page »